Another Birthday? Where shall we go? FARGO??
It was a cold dark night in February….but still it is The perfect time for our
VWF family to once again come together for a fun packed weekend adventure. A celebration of another year for our family group
in support of our veterans and families. . How wonderful it will be to meet with everyone.
Bev and Jo stepped carefully from the noisy locomotive and entered the dilapidated train
station, hoping to keep warm as they waited for the entire family to arrive. The clock on the wall tells us we are
right on time. Danny and Lynn were already inside huddled by a wood stove.
In just a few minutes the station door flies open, which startles Bev…. and Jo
screeches…"Are we being attacked? Who or what on earth is that? Danny jumps to his feet and goes to have a closer look…then
tells us…."Steve, has arrived. Bev squeals are you kidding me? Steve is that really you? Hard to tell with those ice
chips stuck to your face! I was so worried. We all stood stunned for just a moment speechless as we checked out this incredible
looking contraption before us.. Sure enough…there sat Steve in his souped up wheel chair, with Armour plated, machine
guns mounted, super charged power pack…all decked out…..way to go bro! Bev can’t help notice his blue knees,
knobby and uncontrollably shaking from the cold. His teeth chattered fiercely as he tried to speak….No time to waste!
It was time for action so we took control of the situation. Broke into Steve’s private stock of fortification, ER um
homebrew shine, pried his teeth apart and poured until the jug was nearly empty….saving the last swallow or two for
ourselves ofcourse… Jo says good stuff Steve, have some Bev….kinda on the hot side but not bad at all says Bev
as she gasps to catch her breath." Steve tried to speak again in protest and after a few attempts and several gulps, finally
did manage to get the words out….. How did I ever get talked into this trip he asks? Marti could have warned us that
it would be -32º! here in Farrr gggoooo. Gonna be a really long weekend! By then Aletta and Clarence arrived telling Steve
not to worry ….and reassures him that weatherman Don said that it will warm up to –20 tomorrow. Oh wonderful…
says Steve. Danny mutters" what do you expect? The girls planned this trip". Just then there is a commotion outside the station.
There is a rider on horseback quickly approaching. Could it be our "whats his face wildman
Dave?" Fabulous! A bus packed full of excited travellers stops and unloads passengers, wonderful, Pick up trucks, campers
and bicycles pull in behind them., what a site! and even a big beautiful air balloon touching down …..POW/MIA letters
stand out in the moon light…Has got to be none other than Paul and Princess Patti . How sweet it is!
Wildman Dave greets everyone smiling and waving with one hand and rubbing is backside
with the other. He tells us with a grin that it wasn’t such a bad trip but he was beginning to feel some serious tenderness
in one particular cheek…several of the ladies giggled as they continued to welcome all. Danny looked around calling
out to see that everyone had safely arrived. Some are not here and Aletta wants to know where Marti is…anyone seen Marti?
she calls out her name once again. "Marti"….but …nope no Marti here. Very strange.
…. Over the laughing and various joyful chatter we notice wildman Dave and Steve
heads together chuckling about something and then hear . "Might be that Marti is still stuck in a snowbank…ya think?
Oh those bad boys are at it again! In the midst of all our excitement, shivering and constant chattering of teeth, our station
master informs us that someone named Marti has just won the Fargo lottery in the amount of $111.14 …Oh my what will
she do with all of that??? And included was a round trip, all expense paid cruise to Bermuda for her and 300 of her
closest friends…. NOW BOARDING! So we must go quickly.. Didn’t take long for us to accept that offer. How nice
it will be to get back to anywhere warm says Steve….
Pam DA First (ghost writing for our BEV)
Marti and Bev head up the gang plank arm in arm laughing and talking. Bev pointing to
the blue sky and the tall ship as we get settled on board.
PJ, Betty, Aletta and Pam are going up to the wheel house to talk to the Captain. Bev
yells, "Don't touch the turquoise button!" We laugh and wave. Just then Steve, DaveWHF and Danny come up the gang plank laughing
and carrying a barbeque pit, three large coolers, 24 jugs of corn and a stuffed parrot...that is perched on Steve's shoulder.
Don comes aboard carrying a ton of papers flapping in the breeze with all the weather reports for the next three days. Don
tells Steve there are no hurricanes in sight. Shaking his head in bewilderment, "First time in 75 years that there isn't an
ill wind on the ocean waves. Just calm, calm and quiet seas." Don's shaking his head in disbelief looking bewildered studying
his charts.
Up in the wheelhouse Aletta asks to blow the steam horn...the captain gives his permission
and all along the dock you can hear the reverberation of the loud horn....HOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOooooooooooooootttttttttttttt!!!!!
ALL ABOARD!! WE ARE ON OUR WAY!!! Shouts Aletta. Hooooooooooooooooooottttttttttttttt!!!!!
Everyone on board has their fingers in their ears to lessen the noise. Bev is walking
a zig zag path to the nearest seating area. Marti gets up off the deck and walks slowly over to the lounge chair next to Bev's.
A cute little barman steps up with two huge Purple Flerps for Marti and Bev. Bev takes a huge sip and decides the color purple
is her very favoritist color in the whole wide world. Marti just laughs and agrees, calls the barman over and orders two more!
The Captain lets Aletta steer the ship out of port. Aletta is so excited she can't stop
hopping up and down. Steve sees her jumping and starts screaming...."ALETTA'S STEERING THE SHIP! SOMEONE GRAB HER AND TIE
HER UP!!!" Pam quietly locks the door to the wheelhouse and PJ gets on the loud speaker and says......Attention People! This
is your Cruise Director and I'm tellin' ya to get out there and start having FUN!!! The three Pam's were looking out the great
wheelhouse windows waving to everyone on board. Karlene looked up from the deck and said, Come on Marti, we are being summoned.
As they walked towards the Lido Lounge they studied their map and Deb B., Deb E. and Ruth brought up the rear. "Let's get
this PAHTEE STARTED!" was the shout the men heard. Paul and Princess Patti sit at the cabana bar having a cup of coffee and
looking around to see who all are onboard. Lynn is helping Danny drag a huge tent next to the pool. Why again are we putting
up this tent she asks? Danny smiles and says, "I thought you'd like to sleep under the stars. Here on board the ship out in
the ocean away from city lights we'll be able to see more stars than you could ever imagine." Danny walks away.
Danny starts getting the BBQ grill set up by the side of the pool. Dave WHF was walking
around the pool carrying a beautiful hand carved Cherrywood walking stick with a carved eagle at the top. He was deep in thought
as he rubbed the head of the eagle with his thumb and gazed into the seas clear deep blue water. Steve was setting up the
Snack Shaque and getting ready to open some libations.
When Bev staggered over to Jo and said..."Hey MaJO, what's that PURPLE thing over there
on the horizon?!!!" MaJo said,"I think it's.......OH, MAN!!!.....Jo waving her arms screams........WATCH OUT ALETTA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I think we're in for a..............................
Marti writing....)
what is that pod of whales doing out here? Perhaps they are here to make sure we have
a Whale of a good time chorus the 3 Pams!! Aletta maneuvers around the whales with a loud call for a hard to port, thinking
she was going to make a right hand turn.
Steve has been busy getting his Snack Shaque open and proudly offers some of his lil
kumquats from home! Steve announced loudly that he had some special "butt rubs" if anyone needed any. To which Dave WHF replied,
Very Funny! as he walked away still rubbing his one cheek just a bit and swinging his Eagle head walking stick Steve’s
way.
Deb B. and Deb E. were busy getting just the right kind of music playing, some of that
good Caribbean steel drum music to soothe us with. Really, what could go wrong? All we had to do was sit back and relax as
Aletta took us away from the dock, and turned right to avoid the Bermuda Triangle. No worries there as Aletta knows port from
starboard, right? After several more Purple Flerps, Marti wasn’t sure if port was North or South on the map, but Karlene
had a handle on it. She just kept turning the map back right side up.
Danny’s BBQ was fired up, and the smells coming from that corner of the Lido deck
were out of this world! Don was carefully rechecking his weather reports at a table out of the wind. He had MaJo there who
finally got Bev settled in so her hair wouldn’t get mussed! Meanwhile, PJ has decided that she needs Ruth to be her
assistant cruise director, and hollers for her to come on UP!
I looked around and wondered just where DaveWHF had wandered off to; surely he wasn’t
getting lost already on the ship was he? I find Dave, Steve and Danny huddled off by one of the lifeboats looking back out
across the water. I hear them muttering something about being a bit off course. (I am still mad at those two for sticking
me in that snow bank!! Although those Purple Flerps have almost thawed me out!)
Of course the rest of the group are having a real good time on the Lido deck, enjoying
the sun, the music and just talking. We have no cares in the world, as we know Aletta would never steer us wrong!
Suddenly, Dave comes back and says, Hey Bev you was right! There is something else out
there. Danny and Steve are on watch, the BBQ is suddenly on hold, while all eyes turn to the ocean blue and suddenly what
should appear but a………wait, I can’t quite make out the flag on that ship coming up behind us. Is it
a, NOOO it can’t be a……….
Betty
Bermuda flag BUT IT IS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! It is the famous Bermuda Triangle Warning
Ship...I'd know that flag anywhere !!! They could feel the beginning of a spin as the ship entered these waters but it was
too late.
Marti yelled "There has to be safe places to go...does anyone have an idea where to go?"
Of course no one agreed upon the same place! "Then it is up to each of you to find your own place!" There was a lull and PJ
yelled when I say 'go', everyone take off to where you think YOU will be safe until we get out of here! "On your mark, get
set, GO!". We didn't know these people could move so fast! Steve and Danny took off for the engine room - they were going
to try to stop this ship; Don launched a lifeboat to try to get bearings from the Navigational Chart he had taken with him-
weather was easier to predict without all the ship's electronics; Pam took off to the Galley...she wanted to get some recipes
from the Chef! and thought this could be her last chance!; PJ went right to her State Room...she was going to hide under the
covers until this ridiculous rocking was over...a nap was where she wanted to go!; Aletta and Marti took off for the swimming
pool...each had their little rubber duckies with them! They figured if they were thrown overboard, they'd already be wet and
the ducks would save them!; Bev and Jo went to see the entertainers...they heard it was a group of guys performing at that
time! They wanted to see what kind of 'shape' they were in once they realized what was happening!; Dick went to the Captain's
table...honored as a WWII Vet and Paul went with him as a Nam Vet, they'd been invited because the Ship's Captain was a Korean
vet and they were not going to miss a free meal!; and WHF (Wildman) went to the Crow's Nest...he wanted to see the Navigation
Chart (no map here, WHF!) but Don had the chart!; Pam M and Debby E decided to lock themselves in the Beauty Parlor on the
ship...what a great way to pass the time sitting in those chairs that spun around and trying out all the products!; Betty
just stood there watching them all go in different directions! Then she headed out to her State Room!
Then the entire ship began spinning! They thought it was an attack of vertigo but this
was more than vertigo! WHF hollered down that they were definitely in the Bermuda Triangle. OOOOPPPPPS! The guys in the engine
room were holding on for all they were worth- unfortunately the levers they held on to controlled the ship's direction!; Don's
little boat was really spinning!, Pam was trying to keep the pots and kettles on the stove; PJ was hanging on to the sides
of her bed!; there was a Tsunami in the swimming pool; and the dancers for entertainment were moving so fast Bev and Jo were
getting dizzy!; everyone at the Captain's table was under the table ...literally!; Wildman was yelling "This isn't on the
map" and he went to the children's play area to get on one of the merry-go-round's horses which were spinning out of control
yelling 'Ride 'em cowboy!". Pam M and Debby E were having a grand time in those chairs! It was sure hard trying to put on
makeup, though!
At this moment when all the party goers are scattered all over the ship and in the water,
they all realized at the same time they were in deep, deep trouble. What is that out there by the Bermuda Triangle ship? IS
IT A ------------------------?????????!!!!!!!!!
Wildman's part below
As all of us saints sit in the lounge chairs on the upper deck watching the bad girls.
Wildman starts playing 5 notes repetedly on his flute. Everyone starts looking up at the sky watching the clouds swirl wildly.
Behind the huge cloud everyone sees bright colored lights flashing. Then they hear a loud deep sound of 5 notes http://datacore. sciflicks. com/close_ encounters/ sounds/close_ encounters_ five_notes_ mothership. wav
like the ones Wildman was playing on his flute. Suddenly a beam of light shoots straight
down from the cloud that covered the entire pool were the bad girls were swiming. Within seconds the beam of light was gone
along with all the bad girls. Danny looked at Steve who was white as a ghost and shaking terribly. Don was telling Danny we
might be in the Bermuda Triangle. Don runs up to the bridge and takes control. He puts the ship at full speed and heads away
from the Bermuda Triangle.
Steve's part
After Steve gains his composure he says to Danny, well it is time to use some of the
tools I brought along for the just in case need. He eases his chair over to a large bag and opens it up bearing 5 large guns
and says, take your pick boys cause this may get nasty.
After awhile Don has the ship under control and we are on the look out for the uh, whatever
it was that took all our Angels.
Chase says well now that all the Angels are gone we don't have to worry about running
short on shine.
Danny said well lets have a toast on that and then we shall start our search for the
Angels but before we could all get our glasses full here comes that uh, whatever it was and a beam of light shone down on
the ships upper deck and dumped all the Angels back on board.....Gosh what a sight that was....Marti's lipstick was all messed
up along with Bev's hair.
We all took off except Steve as he stayed behind to guard his shine, to see what happened
and when we got to the upper deck all them Angels was laughing and carrying on like they had been to a party.
Paul asked what happened and like gals do all started talking at once...none of us guys
could understand what was being said, sounded like a bunch on hens that had just laid eggs.
Dick said hold on now, mama Jo you tell us what happened and the rest of you be quiet.
The
3 Pams looked at Dick very hard but stayed quiet
Mama Jo said well when they took us they thought they had some special things but all
us was carrying on so they could not stand it. These uh, whatever's was sorta discussing amongst themselves what to do with
us and so I guess they decided they didn't need us, so here we are again.
About that time Dave said look over there, what is that.............................
Pam da firsts part.....
As one unit everyone turns their head and looks towards port and sees the Pirates of
the Caribbean getting ready to board our ship!!
Betty: Everyone grab something to fight off these pirates!
Jo: Darn! I actually thought we'd get through the whole weekend without having to save
anyone from anything!
PJ: You brought us all together! Did you EXPECT us all to get along all the time? Poor
poor Jo..sighed PJ.
Marti: Hey! I found a supply of paint balls and the equipment!
All the women lock and load their paint guns. And take aim at the pirates.
Danny, Steve, Chase, Don, Dick, WHF, Paul and the angels husbands were trying to get
five weapons distributed between all of them. (Sort of looked like a big Stooges Movie). Karlene: Why are the pirates dressed
in such pretty colors? Pam da first: I sort of like that guy in the Peach striped pirate shirt over there.
Pam M.: Well, I'm not shooting at any of them! These paint guns will just ruin their
cute clothes!
Pam G.: Hey! Let's go get them all some PURPLE FLERPS! I'm sure they'll settle down after
a few of them!
Bev comes up to the Lido deck with the pirate captain... "As you can see we do not play
well with other people on our ship. If you could, PLEASE (batting her big blue eyes at the Pirate Captain) take your men and
go somewhere else?
Debby E.: Hey Sweetcheeks! Come on over here and have a Purple Flerp with us. Two of
the pirates put down their swords and pick up their drinks. The others follow suit.
Deb B.: Was polishing up the last of the clean glasses and setting up the drinks at the
bar when she said, "does it count that I've put knock out drops in the drinks?" Just as our guys and the pirates were finishing
their drinks.
As one each and every males eyes rolled up in his head and they THUMPED to the ground.
The angels got a huge net and set about getting all the pirates weapons collected and
secured and the pirates tied up.
WHF was the only one still awake...with good reason, because right next to him was a
giant Yellow Rubber Duck and it had.........................................................
(Marti writing....)
started to shake and make some very interesting noises.
WHF could hardly believe his eyes when out of the back of the Giant Yellow Rubber Duck
popped a baby duck, followed by another and another AND SOON there were ducks of all types and sizes walking around the deck
of the ship.
Minutes passed with the only sounds to be heard, a gentle quacking of ducks. Suddenly
Bev spied the ducks and screamed! The ladies all thought another attack was being attempted by the pirates, and rushed over
to Bev’s side.
Shock turned to amazement as one by one they saw the ducks there on the deck. But what
were those little white boxes they each carried on their backs? Bev reached down, and gently picked up one of the fuzzy yellow
baby ducks and looked at the box more closely. It looked like a miniature white Styrofoam cooler! Now why would a duck have
a lil cooler on its back, she thought.
Well she just haaaaaaad to open that cooler up! Sure enough there was something inside.
"What is it?" chorused the ladies who were all gathered round!
Meanwhile, WHF had gotten over his shock at seeing all those ducks coming out of the
Big Yellow Rubber Ducky. Right on cue, his stomach rumbled! Hmmm…….I am getting hungry, and I wonder if my BBQ
is still hot enough to grill on. He ambled off to check on his grill, being VERY careful not to let any of the ladies see
what he was doing…….
You all know what happened when Pandora’s Box was opened, right???? Well, mini
ice coolers on the backs of sweet baby ducks aren’t the same thing. Inside that cooler was a bite-sized piece of chocolate.
So all the ladies bent down to check out the nearest duck and the cooler on its back, and lo and behold each cooler had a
piece of chocolate in it! Well we all know how chocolate makes all bad things better for us women! But the best part of the
cooler was the magic they contained!
Some of us like cream filled chocolate, others wanted nuts, and then there were the chocolate
covered potato chips and blueberries and others found truffles and even some had sugar-free chocolate in theirs! These magic
coolers instantly refilled themselves and somehow had just the right kind in them for whoever opened them up.
!
With that discovery, PJ announced that it was time for some true R & R and that the
next couple of hours we were all off duty! Some went to the Spa for a massage and facials, others went poolside to catch a
few rays of warm sunshine, to the gym to work out (gotta watch the calories) or to get a "new do," while others headed back
to their rooms for a quick nap. Wherever we went, there was a bevy of ducks around us.
Normally ducks leave a mess, but not these ducks! They were magical ducks, and seemed
quite happy to paddle in the pool, walk the deck or just sit and snooze in the sun.
Somehow with the discovery of the ducks, we had forgotten about the Saints, and a rumbling
was heard back where the Saints and pirates lay. St. Steve had woken to find not only his Corn missing, but his ammo bag was
filled with orange kumquats! Nary a bullet or shell to be found in that bag! With a bellow, he rose to his feet ……..
PJ’s part:
…shaking his fist in the air and shouting, " Those ding-dang Angels have been up
to their nonsense again, and so help me………!!!" He was out of breath by that time from shouting and making
his chair jump up and down in his tantrum, like Rumplestiltskin. "Sheesh, Steve", said PJ, "get a grip, for Pete’s sake!!!
This is the first birthday trip for some of our members! You wanna scare them so they’ll never want to come along again!?????"
Betty, Marti, Bev, Jo, Lynn, and 2 Pams (S and M) were huddled together and looking frightened,
when PJ said "Come on now, you’re not really scared of Steve’s tirades after all this time, are you?" They all
shook their heads in unison and pointed back at the nets. The pirates were waking and moving around, grumbling the whole time.
One of the pirates, the only one who didn’t have a scarf on his head but 12 hoop earrings in his left ear, was gathering
the others around him and sneaking glances back at all of us. PJ hurriedly mentioned that she had to check on the ladies in
the beauty parlor and see how Aletta was doing, NOW!! Dodging ducks all the way, she scurried up the ladder, looking over
her shoulder.
About that time, the pirates were loose and headed for noisy Steve. Danny tried to ‘Pssst,
pssst" to Steve but he was too busy having a hissy fit to notice! The head honcho pirate, One Finger Freddie, threw a big
duck at Danny, knocking him senseless for a minute. Using that minute, O.F. Freddie and four of his sturdy shipmates grabbed
hold of Steve , grabbed him by a foot, and dunked him in the swimming pool a few times til he stopped screaming! The ‘Beauty
Shop" girls came rushing out to see what was going on, while Dick and WHF just stood shaking their heads.
Aletta, PJ and Don came out of the wheelhouse to see what was happening. The women got
a bit ticked at Don because, instead of rushing into the fray to protect our members, he looked closely at his papers, got
a wicked grin on his face and said, "wait for it, wait for it!" Suddenly out of the southern sky, fast-moving massive dark
clouds appeared…..thunder rumbled….lightening flashed, and Don laughed out loud!! Before the pirates could even
look up……….
Pam M.
-A HUGE WAVE OF WATER COME ROLLING
OVER THE SHIP!!!! RIGHT WERE THE
PIRATE'S STOOD...SWOOPING THEM OUT TO SEA.
WHILE EVERYONE FROM THE GROUP HUNG ON FOR THEIR LIVE'S! THE THUNDER AND LIGHTENING GOT
SO CLOSE, THAT IT STRUCK ST.STEVE ON THE
BACKSIDE. CAUSING HIM TO LET GO AND SLIDE INTO WILDMAN DAVE. WHICH
WAS A GOOD THING, CAUSE WILDMAN WAS ABLE TO GRAB HOLD OF HIM. JO AND ALETTA THREW "OUR"
SAINT A BLANKET.
AS THE STORM CALMED AND EVERYONE REALIZED ALL THE PIRATE'S WERE GONE...EXCEPT FOR "ONE
FINGER FREDDIE". PJ LOOKED AT STEVE, AS SHE THREW HIM ANOTHER SET OF TROUSERS...SHE WAS FEELING SORRY FOR HIM,
SEEING HOW THE LIGHTENING UNCOVERED HIS BOTTOM WHEN HE WAS STRUCK....OF CORSE...OVER
IN THE CORNER WAS PAM S.,PAM G. AND PAM M. WERE LAUGHING SO HARD, THEY COULD NO LONGER STAND UP!!!!
SOON DANNY,DON,BETTY,MARTI AND LYNN THOUGHT THEY SHOULD CHECK
AROUND TO MAKE SURE EVERYONE WAS OKAY. THEY LOOKED OVER THE SIDE OF THE SHIP...AND THERE
THEY SAW ALL THE DUCKS FLOATING IN THE OCEAN. JO LOOKED AROUND AND SHOUTED, "THINGS ARE GOING TOO SMOOTH. WITH ALL BUT ONE
PIRATE GONE AND ALL THE QUACKING DUCKS OUT TO SEA...
THERE IS ALWAYS A CALM BEFORE THE 'REAL' BIG STORM!!!!
HOWEVER ST.STEVE YELLED OVER TO JO AND SAID,"SPEAK FOR YOURSELF, DON'T SAY EVERYTHING
IS TOO SMOOTH...YOUR HINNY WASN'T HIT WITH LIGHTENING!!!"
ALL THE SUDDEN PJ. ALETTA AND BETTY LET OUT A BLOOD CURDLING SCREAM. MANUEL, CHASE, DICK
AND PAUL SHOUTED,"OH NO!!!!...................
-Aletta
As One Finger Freddie approached Steve pointing at his brightly glowing hinny. He joined
in with the three Pam's laughing...but not for long! As he was laughing with them, they pushed him overboard along with his
shipmates, did a high five on a job well done and proceeded to enjoy Steve's light show..
Meanwhile, Don, Danny, PJ, Dave and Betty were throwing water on Steve's hinny. It seems
the glow was getting brighter. Oh noooooooo....don't anyone strike a match yelled someone in the crowd. Too late to worry
about that as it appeared that poor Steve on fire! He jumped and bounced up and down slapping at the flames furiously. Marti
says it was because of the shine he had hidden in his chair....As they finally got his butt put out. Jo, Chase, Dick and Paul
yells to come look...It was a beautiful sunrise in the east...we angles and saints stared at it's magnificence. The silence
was broken by a scream.... Pam S screams and runs because ....
Debby writes:
It is rather upsetting to see a shark feeding frenzy even if the object of that frenzy
is a pirate! And besides that there is a huge storm wall moving toward them .
Jo looked around and asked if anyone
was going to bother steering this stupid boat. Where in Bob looked at her and asked her if she hadn't learned anything
in all his years in the Navy - "This is a SHIP! And, yes, I'm headed for the bridge now." He looked around and spotted
Deb E's husband "Stan grab some help and head for the engine room. I'm going to need someone I can trust down there.
Steve, get these women below decks and Dave make sure the hatches are secure." Looking around at the people looking at him
he bellowed "move it people!"
So Bob and Don headed for the bridge while Steve seconded Paul to herd the rest below
decks. They all went to one of the interior lounges where the bar was opened and snacks were broken out.
True to form
Bev asked why she couldn't wait in the beauty shop as that huge wave destroyed her hair do and 2 of the Pams agreed with her.
Since it was also below decks, neither Steve nor Paul could find a good reason to deny them and off they went to explore the
goodies.
On the bridge Bob turned the ship into the wind to ride out the storm. And down in the engine room Stan discovered
St Joe in the tool locker tinkering with his newest Bicycle aquisition! "Good, another mechanic."
Joe retorted, "Yeah,
but I was an aircraft mechanic."
Stan shot back "So I worked on tanks. Engines are engines. Let's get to work making
sure these will do what is necessary to get through the storm."
Back in the lounge Princess Patti is helping Debby
pass out drinks and snacks; she found a bottle of 190 proof Everclear and handed it to Steve telling him it is as close to
his shine as they stock on this tub.
About that time the storm caught up with them.
With all the rocking and rolling on the ship and the downing of 190 proof there were going to be
some vey sick people
So Don was trying to find the seasick pills however the medical facilities had been taken over by
the bar and stuff had been moved out, so the sicknees would be UNAVOIDABLE but then that would be ok too since
things were going to go from bad to worse if they were sick they could not see that a course change was happening but oh they
could feel it as the rolls became steeper and steep approaching 45 degrees as Don brought the ship to a course of 000 or due
north for the land lubbers which he would tell all that was the shortest way to get out of the storm. Everyone was looking
a liitle GREEN peaked however as they broke out in some sunshine and don grinned at all saying SEE i told all would be well
now all we have to deal with is that as he points to the long black object hanging over the bow of the ship
Danny
Everyone starts talking about what this long black object could be. Everything becomes
deathly quiet and not even a breeze is blowing, and the water is like glass with not even a ripple. There is no time to avoid
the black object and the ship heads straight into the object. All of a sudden the winds dramatically increases, all the electronic
equipment quits working. Don realizes since the sip has computer controlled steering and everything else is computer controlled
that nothing works. Steve and Dave yell that we are headed into a vortex and going back in time
Pam S.
Bev and Pam S. are closest to the doorway and have their heads together whispering to
each other...Jo hears Pam say, "Well, it's the only thing we can do to get us out of here!" As Jo helplessly looks towards
Bev and Pam S. as they crawl, scramble and run to the wheelhouse of the ship. As Pam and Bev walk mesmerized by the brightly
flickering light....Jo shouts....PLEASE BEV! DON'T TOUCH THAT ............ AND of course, she's one word short of getting
it all out before Bev put out her hand and smacks the bright flickering turquoise button on the control panel... LOUD, OBNOXIOUS
HOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOTTTTTTTTTTTTTTING IS HEARD....and then, A BLINDING BRIGHT FLASH OF BLUE LIGHT lights up the whole
ship...it begins to spin (counterclockwise)...Danny grabs hold of the arm of Steve's hopped up wheelchair/tank, Paul has P.Patti
by the hand, Dick, WHF, Betty, PJ, Aletta and the Two Pam's, The two Deb's and Marti all are screaming and falling to the
floor when it all disappears in the Blue Flash.....
spiraling down the vortex...Jo, Bev and Pam S. stand at the edge and laugh as St. Steve
spins by. Jo waves at him as his sparkly hinny smokes and pops back to life like a little firefly....Jo, Bev and Pam yell..."You'll
see your VWF birthday present when you hit the ground!"...and all St. Steve can do is wonder what they are talking about or
if they may have had one Purple Flerp too many.
Jo, Bev and Pam holding hands jump into the swirling vortex and everything turns black.
St. Steve wakes up feeling as if every bone in his body has been deep frozen...as he
opens one eye, he sees snow everywhere! And in the full moonlight he sees Mt. Rushmore with one, two, three, four presi....wait!
FIVE heads??????????? As he looks closer he sees his head up there with some of the greatest presidents in the history of
our country...as he whacks Danny in the ribs to revive him Danny reaches over to sit up and pushes the button to the Ground
to Air missiles...two of them...a loud thundering explosion is heard...and as everyone watches St. Steve's head crumbles off
the side of Mt. Rushmore. That's when St. WHF notices that St. Steve's hinny isn't on fire anymore because they are all laying
in a huge snow drift with all the empty corn likker casks around them....St. Steve says, this is gotta be a dream!!!
About that time all the Angels come out of the tiny train station giggling and laughing
with boxes and bags from the Mall of the America's. We had the best time of all shopping at the mall!
YOU ROCK ANGELS!!!!!
the end